I've been second guessing myself more than usual lately. I don’t like doing because it gets me down but my mind has its own mind right now.
It has me thinking if I can really do this some days… raise three kids under 15 months. You know those days where your babies are super whiny and clingy and all they want to do is be held? Yup, those days. Where my mind wonders and starts thinking about what happens when all three are crying? What am I going to do when all three want to be held? Or when all three are sick? how do we do this?
Jp has been so miserable the past few weeks because of a double ear infection. All he has wanted is to be held or to lay down. Joc doesn’t like it when all I do is hold him so I end up having to hold her too. It is getting so hard to rock them because its very uncomfortable with this big ol’ belly! I was rocking them the other night and just started crying because I was thinking how in the world am I going to be able to soothe the other one? Its scary. Not scary but it just worries me.
I know that all of this is coming from a place inside me that’s just hormonal. A place deep down inside that is scared. A place where I am realizing just how miserable I am getting at this stage of the pregnancy. I am literally huge and its getting so hard to do anything. I know that when this precious gift from God gets here that all of those worries will go out the window and ill go back to being who and what I am, and that’s a MOM.
I know how to take care of two babies. Surely it isn't that hard to adjust to two toddlers and one baby right? RIGHT? I am prepared for the worse. Or at least I think I have prepared myself. I know the worse will be the absolute worse. When all three babies are sick, wont eat and wont sleep. When all they want is to be held. When that time comes we will handle it just like any other parent would. I will try and hold all three and turn on cartoons because I'm sure that’s what they will want to do.
I keep stressing about all of the “what if” bad times that I'm not focusing on all the good times we will experience. We are bringing a little miracle into this world and he or she will have a family that love them oh so much. A big brother and a big sister, a mommy, a daddy and a canine sister. God gave us this little miracle for a reason and I feel so unbelievably blessed that he did because we thought we would never have another baby.
So I can stress all I want but the truth is that it will all be ALRIGHT! I promise! The pregnant me doesn’t know this yet. I honestly cannot wait to meet this little nugget! Just 7 more weeks! I will see you then ,y little blessing;)
Moms of three under 2~ Any Advice?